His piece is always entertaining.
Dalton Tanonaka: On the Cutting Edge of Life
Take my second week on the ground. I met a doctor and gave him my business card. He handed me my appendix. What I thought was relatively simple food poisoning turned out to be a slightly urgent case of appendicitis.
Dr. Liem didn't mince words. He minced one of my intestinal organs. And I came to learn that usus buntu (appendix) is not the primary ingredient of sop buntut (oxtail soup).
The routine vehicle explosives search at the hotel I initially stayed at took some getting used to. To someone who uses a mirror only for last-minute studio touch-ups, I was very interested to know what the security guard would do if he actually spotted a bomb.
"Run," said my driver Effendi with a straight face.
Honesty, I've found to the contrary of Indonesia's international image as a land of corruption, is in large supply. And sometimes you get more than you bargain for.
I was hired to create and anchor an international standard English-language weekly program for the country's 24-hour news channel Metro TV. Owner Surya Paloh told me "do what it takes" to tell the true story of Indonesia.
But he didn't tell me I can't have a cookie jar on my desk.
Like any of the countries and companies I've worked in throughout Asia, each has its own unique set of rules and practices. For example, in Tokyo at NHK, Japan's biggest television network, cute cleaning ladies will march right into the restroom to do their work while you're doing your business. It's hard to shake hands when yours are already full.
And in Hong Kong, I didn't know it was bad luck to buy flowers from the building near my CNN office. The prices were really cheap. No one translated "Hong Kong Funeral Home" for me soon enough.
So when my executive producer Rullah came to see me the other day with a grave expression on his face, I braced for the worst. Had I offended Metro's corporate culture by not wearing the official blue uniform shirt handed out to every employee? Did I upset my fellow presenters by brushing my teeth in the same sink where they wash for daily prayers?
"Dalton, I have to be honest with you," said Rullah, an engaging Indonesian with an Australian accent. "You must take the Oreos off your desk."
What?
"Our office policy is that you can't have any food in sight. Sorry."
Whew. Visions of visa problems and worries about the report we did questioning Tommy Suharto's early release from prison had been flashing in my head.
"No problem, Rullah," I said. "Thank you for being honest."
Another office colleague hit closer to home. In fact, she took dead aim at what could have been a very touchy subject.
"I don't want you to take this the wrong way," said Candy, the leader of the company's Mandarin team. "But you need to look fresh. You should color your hair."
If I wasn't secure about the graying of my temples and the march of Father Time, I might have had reason to be offended. But she was sincere in wanting to brighten my on-air appearance by darkening my roots. So I took it in the spirit her advice was given.
"Let me check the lighting," was how I think I responded.
So while government leaders are reluctant to say the bird flu is Indonesia's potential international nightmare, and corporate titans play ownership games in the East Java mud disaster, those at ground level tell it like it is.
I do appreciate the candor, and as a newcomer hope the straight talk continues in the following ways:
-Give me the real reason why you were late for the meeting, rather than the standard "traffic was bad." Tell me you couldn't miss the last half of Celebrity Jam, or that you had to mediate an argument between your first wife and your second wife.
-Warn me that the Rp. 6,000 DVD copy of Casino Royale might freeze three times, or that someone going for popcorn blocks out the crucial scene.
-Forgive me if I accidentally ask you if you want Spam with your eggs and you're Muslim. It's a Hawaii thing.
-If I ask you out on a date, and you don't really want to go, please don't tell me "we'll see." I've learned that essentially means "I'd go out with a komodo dragon before I'm seen in public with you."
-Tell me where my cookie jar is.
Hawaii native Dalton Tanonaka is the anchor of Metro TV's "Indonesia Now" program, seen on Friday nights at 7:30 p.m. An award-winning journalist, he has worked at CNN International and CNBC in Hong Kong, and NHK in Tokyo. He is the author of three books, and plays in a rock-and-roll oldies band in his spare time.
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